Sea Pig Role Playing Game!
The sea pig role playing game is a wonderful chance for children
and adults to exercise their own repressed fantasies about magic
and vixens and other areas of the occult and dragons! This
however is not D&D, it is a learning experience, for novices
and hard-core dicebag-carrying RPG enthusiasts. SWIM shortly
expects a collectible card game to be released and for this game
to be one of the most popular venues at GENCON and GEEKSPO 2001!
We can only hope. It is a simple game, but with many varied and
exciting possible adventures. who knows, maybe there will even be
a board game!
Sea Pig Classes:
Deep Sea Sea Pigs -
The deep sea pigs have small eyes, because in the darkness sight
is not very important. they also have big ears and are quiet, but
are also known to not have very good manners. deep sea pigs are
best known as miners, trash collectors and pimps. They also are
the heavy weapons class.
Beach Sea Pigs -
The sea pigs that are common to the beach have a very thick skin,
as they spend far more time out of the water than any other sea
pig class, and have extremely good trading skills, they are often
middlemen between humans and sea pigs. watch for them also as
shopkeepers, and other types of burgeouis! Magic is very strong
in this breed.
Shallow Sea Sea Pigs -
The shallows, as they are called, are shy and elfish sea pigs.
they have fine manners and are very well behaved and are
important in the sea pig world. they are often govermental types
and very rich. But shallows are found across all walks of life,
and are very influential in many areas of the sea.
Ogre Sea Pigs -
Ogre sea pigs, although rare, do exist. they are smelly, evil
mutants and other outcasts from the sea pig world. beware of
these characters, they can be quite mean! Some know dark spells
and are friends with dark porpoises.
Humans -
Humans are often the nemesis of sea piggery, they live in
villages on land but often are near the sea, fishing. many of
them are evil, especially the type known as 'corporatists' who
only know destruction. Humans deal often in equipment and are
much more technology oriented than magic. There are many human
clans.
Pigmen -
Halfbreeds. Man and pig. They are angry at the world for not
being able to fit in either on land or at sea. Its a shame
really, many are often very pleasant.
Porpoises -
Dark - mean, evil porpoises with a dark purpose
Light - the very opposite of dark porpoises
The rival classes of porpoises have been locked in rivalry since
the beginning of time. it is not known what has started this, nor
what will end it.
Sea World
This is the world of the sea pig. it is a land much like Earth,
but it is called Water World locally. Water is what gives life..and
takes it away. It is a dangerous world, but also one filled with
hope. Mighty motor boats ply the oceans and rivers, and it is
teeming with life.
The main languages spoken in the SP RPG are piggish and
humanspeak. piggish is a beautiful, lilting language of Love,
while humanspeak sounds like German crossed with Hebrew and
Vietnamese. Klingon is pretty sexy talk compared to it. Most
humans live inland, as they are afraid of the sea, and only treat
it as a dumping ground and something to urinate in. Others are
close to the sea, mainly old men in small boats, but there are
fisheries and traders who are frequently in contact with it.
Pigmen travel back and forth. Porpoises are often diplomats
between rival camps of sea pigs, or between classes of sea pigs
and human villages, and serve whatever purpose they are paid.
Money is seashells and electrum, 2.2 pounds of seashells
equalling 2.2 pounds of electrum, which can be exchanged for
goods and services. Goods might include machinery, boats,
engines, food, cloaks and bamboo sticks. Services might include
carwashes, the medical field, and prostitution. Pigmen females
are often highly prized in both sea pig and human camps, for
their soft skin and cozy bosoms.
There is a heavy trade near the sea of different kinds of
equipment. Motorboats, harpoons, nets, poison, and mines are
freely traded here. there are some humans, namely the
'corporatist' clan, who have declared a jihad against all sea
pigs and wish to see them exterminated. They often have dark
porpoises.
Psy Powers
Many characters have Psy powers. some are born that way, some are
trained. just use your head when it comes to psy powers.
The porpoises
The low level war between dark and light porpoises has raged for
all time. it is pure good, versus pure evil. this war can be
almost negligable to some characters, but very central to others.
it is not a shooting war so much as struggle for power and
influence, although in the far away past is has flared into
bigger proportions, drawing in non-porpoises with their own
purposes. At varying times both dark and light porpoises,
according to their purposes, have been allied with humans, sea
pigs, mages, vampires, pigmen, orcs, fairies and trolls.
Combat and Character
development
Combat is resolved by rolling 1 - 40 sided die by all parties,
and whoever gets the higher number wins. The winner ten rolls a 6
sided die to determine where the damage is, 1=head, 2=body, 3=arms,
4=legs, 5=back, 6=groin. the winner then rolls a 20 sided die to
determine howmuch damage. this continues until someone dies,
there is no surrender, no retreat. it is a battle to the death,
just like jaques cousteau would have wanted.
Charisma and hit points and other things are on a 1000 point
scale, during character development everyone starts out with 25
points for the following: hit, magic, charisma, intelligence,
strength, aptitude, attitude, beauty, sexual stamina, sexual
prowess, luck, dexterity and alertness. Everyone starts out with
50 points for the following: musical ability, mechanical skills,
sewing, digging, road building. Everyone starts out with 100
points for the following: gymnastic ability.
After that, everyone gets 100 extra points to spend, and starts
out on level one, which has a modifier effect on all aspects of 1,
and there are 1000 levels. levelling intially is set arbitrarily
by the GM, and can be raised through experience or buying with
seashells or electrum.
Well, more details will be issued later but this should be a good
start, its been thoroughly playtested at CUSPEE headquarters and
its blast mammal! Remember, capes or some type of medieval suit must be
worn at all times by players. a sea pig costume is also acceptable, only
if you are a sea pig class member. the lights must be low, and if your mom and
dad can supply some dingdongs or twinkies, that would add to the whole
experience. braces optional, just try to have fun more than anything
and learn about the sea pigs! spread the SWIM message!
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