The Nefarious NRA
The NRA is a multifaceted menace. Not only to your average gunless Joe on the street, but to sea pigs as well. A little known fact about the NRA is that in addition to their encouragement of unlimited rifle, handgun and assault rifle usage, they support spear guns. Spear guns are used with alarming effectiveness against sea pigs. they can be shot from within the sea, or even from the land, into the sea, or from the land, into the air, and then into the sea. This is how some poachers earn their living, by taking potshots from the safety of their own homes, assuming they live on houseboats.
What is feared most by SWIM is that every American will own a spear gun, and start carrying it around the streets, in addition to their child killing handguns, their deer killing rifles, and mother killing assault guns. who can say how many little Johnnys and Mary Janes will be needlessly slaughtered while playing with their parents unstowed spearguns, dead or possibly scarred with a large hole somewhere in their body resulting from a child's innocent curiosity and penchant for hurting themselves.
It is the opinion of SWIM that parents are obviously too lazy and irresponsible to be given the right of protecting their own children against the menace of those horrible inanimate objects, guns. especially spear guns. why whould we allow parents to take it upon themselves to use a few moments of forethought and effort to properly stow a spear gun when the government can just take away all the guns? But instead, the NRA believes that every child obviously should be forced to daily dodge countless spears flying at them from every direction. Its not people that need help mentally, or parents who shirk their responsiblities that must be stopped, it is the spear guns themselves!
Also, the sea pigs suffer. The NRA monthly devotes 30 pages of their magazine "NRA Murderfest Monthly" and 4 pages of the periodical "Gun Wound Glory" to tirades against sea pigs and actually encouraging speargun owners to hunt sea pigs for "SPORT"!!
This has got to be stopped. call your senator, write your representative and picket your governors house. If you live in Minnesota, which is governed by "The Body" Jesse Ventura, ex-wrestler, we recommend wearing headgear and some pads as he has been known to body slam and double suplex anyone he finds disagreeable.
Here are a few examples of what SWIM proposes to ban, and some covers from NRA literature we find particularly offensive. This below is a hollow point explosive harpoon, which is used widely against sea pigs and criminals. A well fired harpoon from a spear gun will effetively behead and gut a sea pig with its explosive charge, thus saving the poacher a lot of work. These units are actually produced by SunKist Tuna. Shame on you, Charlie!
These pictures below are from various sources, and depict the result of hollow point explosive harpoons on sea pigs. No comment can be made as i dry my eyes...
This is the cover of a recent "NRA Murderfest Monthly" magazine. It's disgusting encouragement of killing and maiming is disgusting and also note the horrible article devoted to beautiful sea pigs. The summary of this article is that sea pigs should be exterminated, although the article uses the term "preferred treatment" but we all know what that means. It claims that sea pigs deliberately ram boats, clog propellors, and eat small children who dare come within 50 feet of water. The author lists several ways to "protect" oneself against the sea pig menace, including owning spearguns and having them ready!
This is a slightly older "Gunshot Wound Glory" magazine, and is one of the first that involve a hatred for helpless sea pigs. The article is basically a rant against sea pigs, homosexual communists, and jewish world conspiracies, in that order. As if the sea pig, floating in its ocean world, cares what we do on land! It also purports to include photographs of sea pig attacks.
Not only does it hurt the sea pig,
it hurts our rights as Americans. Or Canadians. Or whomever we
may be, when spearguns are walking our streets. It is a shame we
live in such a world of mammal injustice!
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