Save Water Indigenous Mammals

Monica, we hardly knew ye..

A sad, sad Garp coming at ya here. As many of you may have noticed, Monica hasnt been making posts, and she hasnt been in the office either. Tammy called me this morning and tearfull informed me that Monica has passed away. She had an undisclosed heart deformity, apparently it was about two sizes too small and just couldnt keep up with her increased weight. she died peacefully in her sleep.

She was a good woman, a fair woman, or as she liked it, a womyn. she had spring in her step and love in her voice, she was a woman for men and women alike. as prevalent a wordsmith i am, this short eulogy will not do her justice. i believe everyone here at SWIM headquarters will be writing one for her, and possibly her life partner, Tammy, as well as posts and farewells from the SWIM rank and file. this came at such a bad time, she had such plans, especially right after our NRA protest, at which she out yelled and out protested many of their most burly men. I will be posting this demonstration soon, dear SWIM members.

Here at SWIM, we dont like to think we lost so much of a beloved member, as gained a martyr. she gave her life, her very last breath, in fighting for the sea pigs. she felt this way about all animals, but like us, felt that she was very close to a pig. so in death, too, she glorifies our cause of mammal awareness and enlightenment, and spreads far and wide the soldidarity and message of SWIM.

We here at SWIM pledge to sustain her memory, and her good deeds here at SWIM, and not tarnish our memories with her many crudities and vulgarites. here at the SWIM website we will construct a permanent shrine to her consisting of whatever pictures we can dig up, eulogies and writings, to praise her and her dedicated cause that she gave so much for, SWIM and the sea pigs. Her graduation picture is below, its the only one available but there are more to follow. That is her with her dog, Tuffy.

Monica's most recent picture. Rest her soul in peace! as she would cry, 'Long live the Sea Pig!'

Garp's Eulogy Monolgue

Garp here, coming at ya for the departed monica. Monica was a fine womyn, a good womyn, a loving womyn who loved in return. she loved all animals, was full of love, and spread love. she brightened out days with laughter, and our nights with light. she was an asset to SWIM, to be sure, and gave to the cause with reckless disregard for self. which is sadly why we make these eulogies at all. she died for us, the sea pigs, and our sins. it reminds me of the John Tesh song, 'memories on a sea of salt', in which her memory will remain for her. one day, perhaps, we will see her again. but not until all of us has given our lives and eternal souls, our ponytails and trustfunds in the fight. as my mother says, the basement is no place to experiment with your body, so too is the basement no place to mourn. get up, go out, live life but always keep in your heart the knowledge that monica is in a better place. the cold, cold earth. which is where we all came from. excepting of course sea creatures, who are born in the sea, like mollusks, turtles, and big fish like whales. and of course our friend, the sea pig. that of course excludes amphibians which spend some time on the land. or the lung fish, and things like that. which are all a part of this earth, as a whole. spaceship earth, hurtling out into the unknown, around and around the sun, where we'll stop nobody knows, until were there. and that is monica.

A poem for Monica
by Rich

Monica, oh monica,
so sweet and harmonica,
we miss you so dearly,
and now i see clearly,
that without you is no fun,
it is like a vegan hotdog with no bun,

Monica was so happy,
so free and nappy,
i feel good to know,
that wherever she is, there is no snow.

Another poem for Monica
by Rich
Monica's sea, it doth shine
like a bunch of bees in a hive
Your karmic energy is sublime
but its gone since youre not alive

Hyku for Monica
by Rich
Monica has gone
Her desk is empty today
I took her stapler

Stacy's eulogy

Monica, my cats and i agree, you are missed. mr huggles, mr fluffy and mario lemew have said to me many times, that they thought you were neat. im sure that not many cats have so dearly loved a lesbian like you. of course, they havent said to me directly, but they way they meow and walk with a mournful, slow but surefooted way seem to indicate to me, that they mourn your loss. monica, wherever we go and do as a group, SWIM i mean, will be dedicated to your selflessness and all that you gave to the group. i know that you would have wanted me to use your locker at the office. miss you monica.

Roland's Eulogy for Monica

Monica, we didn't always get along so well. but now that youre dead, i dont hold that against u too much. it makes my heart feel sad or something, when i think about never seeing your cherub-like face, with the slight beard. Monica should know that, wherever she may be, be it Hell itself or only purgatory, she is missed by some people here on earth. I'll take good care of her life partner, tammy, now that she is gone, and give her all the good lovin she needs. so fear not, dear monica, that your beloved tammy will go unsatisfied. I can only hope that in your death, not only will SWIM have gained a martyr, but this whole business with everyone thinking im gay blow over. amen.

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