S.W.I.M.

Save Water Indigenous Mammals

THE GREAT PACIFIC INTERVENTION EXPEDITION
by Garp Havana
The Seapig rescue program of February 11th has had mixed results. On one hand, the goals were met. SWIM successfully infiltrated and harassed a diabolical fishing expedition which was shamefullnessly exploiting the sea. Their fishing nets were catching seapigs, who as mammals just as we are, drown in the water and die an early and undeserved death. Whoa, Whoa to them who cross SWIM! We arrived in the early morning and set up our gear, in this first picture you can see one of Stacy's cats, Socks, who came along for the ride. he is quite an adventurous cat.

More about his tragic demise later, i want to believe that it was not all in vane. we loaded up and set out, our boat is kinda small, but it does the job! it was purchased with the a SWIM members trust fund, we like to think that the money, despite her parent's objections, served a higher purpose.it was also outfitted with a wonderful GE stereo system donated by Garp Havana that was salvaged from his mother's garage. To the invigorating sea chants of John Tesh our intrepid gang sallied forth. upon approaching the fishing boat pictured below.

There were only two of them but what damage they cause! If the CUSPEE group in SWIM werent such pacifists, terrible things could have happened to these fisherpeople. but, we are not like that. Roland was restrained. For quite some time we attempted to motor around their boat to throw them off, but theyhad a significantly faster motor and were usually able to avoid us. Amazingly, Greenpeace also showedup to picket these rowdy fisherpeople. In the past Greenpeace and SWIM have not been on the best terms, although they are our brothers in cause, they have tended to be overbearing at times as they have the bigger organization, and have been around for a number of years, and there are a number of stinky frenchmen in the higher positions of Greenpeace that look down their nose and US groups and such. But we have a common cause and SWIM will not sink to their level. As the Greenpeace boat neared us, Stacy started crying and screaming about someone named Serge. It turns out that Stacy dated a frenchman named Serge from Greenpeace for quite some time. she has supplied the picture below. Serge is the man in the yellow, abusing alcohol like any self-righteous frenchman. Stacy says the other woman was his wife, but she hasn't mentioned if he was still married to her at the time. I suspect yes.

Roland was shouting some amazingly complicated obscenities at both the fisherpeople and Greenpeace. It was then that Stacy grabbed the controls and started aiming the boat all over. She was screaming something about Serge and male anger, and i noticed the Green peace boat bearing down on us. A clutter arose as they rammed us and we were all thrown over board. Greenpeace continued on their way, and our boat was on fire. i lost the camera at this point, and 2 john tesh cd's. It is a good thing i had protective sheathing on my ponytail to protect from the acidic saltwater. the picture below of our boat was supplied by the fisherpeople, who actually rescued us.

The Greenpeace boat came back around and rammed our little dinghy, burning as it was, into the shore. this picture below was also supplied by the fisherpeople after they dropped us off. they were a litte angry with us but figured we had a rough deal. Stacy was almost unconsolable. i petted her for quite some time.

After we headed back to SWIM headquarters, Stacy looked at all of us and almost had a seizure. Socks, her cat, had fallen for the cause in the cold acidic waters of the pacific that afternoon. In all the confusion he must have joined the sea pigs. SWIM salutes Socks. These pictures are provided by the mourning Stacy.

He was one cool cat. Buddha rest his soul.
As it was nearly dusk, we at SWIM feel that, despite our fallen mammal warrior, it was a success, as the fishers could not drop their nets due to our annoyance. After we have regroupled, rejuvenated and recovered, we will organize another form or protest. We would like to be friends with Greenpeace, but just like the Sierra Club, they think they are so superior. Therefore we shun Greenpeace like we would shun a rabid dog. Just like we do to Sierras. Excepting to get them help. The rabid dogs of course. Rabies is a terrible disease that we would not wish upon anyone, even Greenpeace or the Sierra Club. Spread the SWIM message!

 


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